Surrogate mom for a relative or friend's child: to be or not to be?

There are people for whom the only way to have a biological child is to seek help from a surrogate mother. These are single parents, representatives of LGBT communities and couples who have been unsuccessfully fighting infertility for many years. Such people can ask for help from an agency or try to find a surrogate mother on their own. She can be actually a friend or a relative, why not?

Becoming a surrogate mother for a child of a friend or relative can become a demanding challenge and can influence your relationships in the future. That is why it creates additional responsibility for both parties.

Taking into account the fact that surrogacy is associated with a lot of legal, emotional and financial issues, it is best to work with a professional agency or a surrogacy motherhood specialist to ensure that the process goes as smoothly and straightforward as possible.

To help understand the details, we prepared answers to the questions that often arise among women, who were asked by close people to become a surrogate mother for their child.

1. Can I become a surrogate mother for my friend (sister, brother, etc.)?

You can become a surrogate mother for a child friend or relative. Despite the fact that you have to carry a new member of your family or child for friends, legally his parents are genetic. Therefore, do not worry about any legal relationship with an unborn child.

2. How to become a surrogate mother for a child of a family member or friend?

The process of surrogacy is complex and requires time. In such a situation, you will not have to wait until the agency selects the parents whose requirements you can meet, and which correspond to yours. However, to ensure the success of the program, we strongly recommend the following steps to be performed with the help of surrogacy agency experts.

The first step in the path of surrogacy motherhood is to understand whether a surrogate is really suitable for the family. It will be necessary to define the emotions and feelings. Despite of the family ties, the child born is still to be given directly to another people, the surrogate will definitely be somehow in touch, directly or indirectly. She also has to consider whether you she is ready to undergo all medical and legal procedures.

The process of surrogacy motherhood can check the strength of your relationship and reveal new insights from the most unexpected side. For example, if you agree to carry a child for a brother or sister, you may have childish feelings of rivalry. While the sister will be eternally grateful for the fact that you carry her child, she may experience acute jealousy, because she cannot do it herself.

Before beginning medical preparation for the surrogacy process, it is obligatory to discuss all the legal aspects of the program. The contract must specify all financial compensation, the possible risks from pregnancy and the procedure for establishing the rights to the child. It is important that each side is protected, and the expectations were legal.

After signing the contract, the process of IVF and embryo transfer begins. You will receive certain medical therapy before the embryo is implanted into the uterine cavity. After the embryos are implanted and the heartbeat is determined, the pregnancy will proceed in the same way as the naturally occurring one.

After giving birth, the surrogate and the biological parents will be able to return home, bound by emotions that will connect them for the rest of their life. It is likely that the child will know what role the woman played in his or her birth and can remain in close contact with her if a child has an opportunity to communicate with her in the future. It will depend on the chosen model.